It’s gorgeous outside right now.  At least from where I’m sitting…which is in a big leather chair next to the window at Starbucks.  The sun is shining bright and while it’s still cold out, I just know that spring is right around the corner.  There are two girls sitting next to me at a table who are so deliriously in love with God that they’ve been giggling for forty minutes straight.  They honestly can’t be more than nineteen or twenty years old and while most girls their age are losing their minds over boys…these two are high on the Holy Spirit.  It’s such an awesome conversation to be overhearing!

I’m sitting here tonight because I – quite literally – got kicked out of the house!!  Apparently I needed a break and the kind of break that could only be found outside of the house!

It’s been almost a full week since I was a part of my very first wedding show and while the experience was super exhilarating…it’s also left me feeling like a ton of bricks.  As we unloaded the last of our set-up on Sunday night, I breathed a sigh of relief and then felt compelled to curl up under my blankets for the next week and a half!  Sometimes you don’t realize just how much work you’ve put into something until it’s all said and done.  For the past three weeks we’ve been finalizing set-up details, confirming orders, framing images, and getting printed materials ready…throw into the mix a sick husband, a sick baby and a brief visit to the ER, and you’ve got yourself a real barrel of laughs!!

Coming away from the wedding show, I was surprised by how much I learned.  I initially made the decision to go for the added visibility but by the end, I was struck with how much it altered my view of business.  After two days spent on a ten foot by ten foot piece of concrete floor in Lansdowne Park, I had a much better vision of the kind of photographer that I want to be.  I also had a better understanding of the kind of photographer that I didn’t want to be.  All of this provided great inspiration for the direction of my business and the kind of relationships that I want to have with my clients.  All in all, I came away with far more than I bargained for.  Which would certainly explain the physical and emotional overload!  So when Steve came home to find me with a baby in one arm, the phone in the other and trying not to have a meltdown at the same time…he gave me the much needed boot!

As I was in the car on my way over, I started to think about all of times that I’ve found myself on a plane over the years and where I learned that one steadfast rule of air travel; if faced with an emergency, always be sure to place an oxygen mask over your own mouth and nose before attempting to assist anyone else with theirs.  I’ve realized this week that this may, in fact, be the most brilliant philosophy I’ve ever heard.  The whole concept of caring for yourself first so that you are better able to help others should be the unbreakable rule of life and not just when boarding a plane!  I’ll admit that it’s a principle that basically goes against my natural instincts since I’m really more of a “go around helping everyone else with their oxygen masks, all the while, running out of air” kind of girl, but I think that I’m actually starting to get it now…at least in theory!  While becoming a Mother has definitely thrown my nurturing side into overdrive, I’ve also been able to learn a thing or two about coming up for air!

This revelation couldn’t come at a better time because I’m about to embark on a very busy and very exciting six month period.  My first wedding of the season is in six short weeks and I still have about a dozen shoots to go before then!  It’s my first summer as a full-time photographer and full is definitely the operative word in that sentence!  As I look around the Starbucks at people reading the paper or catching up with friends, and as I stare outside at couples enjoying the beautiful weather or smile at the chatty girls sitting next to me, I really understandd for the first time that this – my career, my family, my life – simply won’t work without the oxygen mask.  Of course, it works for a little while but eventually, you not only run out of air, but you also run out of patience and grace…two things that I find completely essential to a life well lived.

In a couple of hours I will be permitted to go home again and I will do so feeling renewed.  But more importantly, I will do so with a significantly better understanding of what my future requires in order to keep breathing…and not just in case of emergency…but in case of life!

Oh, and did I mention that I have a much greater appreciation for flight attendants?!?!  Geesh, are they ever wise!